Beauty: An Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter Outtake (ABVH 20.5)

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Added on May 19, 2012 by GenXin Books > Fiction
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Beauty: An Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter Outtake (ABVH 20.5) (Size: 480.84 KB)
 ABVH 20.5 Beauty.pdf480.84 KB

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Beauty: An Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter Outtake (ABVH 20.5)

You're looking for the new snippet of badly typed Blake porn, best choked down with wine that comes from a box, and you're not going to stop until I give it to you, are you?
You think you want this..

Excerpt You’d think I’d get used to seeing such a beautiful man and knowing he was mine, but it never grew old, as if his beauty and the fact that he was mine, and I was his, would forever surprise me. With a vampire like Jean Claude around, it’s far too easy for Anita Blake to doubt her own appearance—and the hold it has on those who love her. But one hot tub and two incredibly sexy men—Jean Claude and Asher—will make her feel like the most lusted-after woman alive…or undead. Not bad for a mere human…


You don't want this. Really, you don't. I'm trying to spare you. I'm trying to save a half hour or less of your life that you will never, ever be able to get back. At best, you'll feel like this afterward, but you'll probably feel worse in that coyote ugly, breath-that-tastes-like-smelly-trainers kinda way that only Hamilton can seem to evoke.

I'm trying to protect you, dear readers, from feeling like you have to scrub your brain with Brillo pads. Beauty is so bad (and I do mean horribly bad on so many levels) that I had to wait for my eyeballs to unstick themselves from the back of my head before doing any of this, especially typing. Not because it was so hawt hawt hawt. It's not not not. Not because it was exciting. It's about as exciting as watching surgery performed on an ingrown toenail. But because it's such a heaping, steaming stinky mess of nauseatingly high school confessional wish fulfillment that I had mild seizures just trying to make it through this little "outtake".

Will you listen to me? Oh, probably not. To be fair, I like my share of junk food, too. I guess I'm just pickier about my "would you like fries with that?" than some people. Not convinced? I'll let the actual fans speak for themselves. The backlash that Hamtilon would charge three bucks for a few pages of what most authors treat their fans to on their websites it just overwhelming. Seems this one was a poor decision all around.

SatireKnight is on it like white on sugar cubes - Go pour a glass and read Beauty, or I Want Money For What My Editor Threw In The Trash http://satireknight.wikispaces.com/Beauty
But, alas, I digress... So you think you wanna inhale a half-eaten moldy cardboard bowling alley pizza, who am I to tell you it's a mistake? Download it here. Just don't complain to me when you get sick off it because bloody well told you so already. I'm still busy growing my skin back and picking random clumps of my hair up off the floor. End of.

Want more LKH hilarity?
The Anita Blake Series Collection
Kiss the Dead (Anita Blake 21)
[Laurell K. Hamilton's Merry Gentry Series (Complete)

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Beauty: An Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter Outtake (ABVH 20.5)

All Comments

Hey, think this could make the wait to get an ultrasound of my gallbladder bearable? I just need a little something to distract me! I'll come back and let you know! (Actually, I'm a fanfic lover so bad porn is fine & I'm waiting for the next Meredith Gentry installment with heavy withdrawals.)

Thanks for posting!
Thank you.
****Adopt an Uploader V2**** program
2012-05-25 20:05
Thanks for help! :)
Thanks, looks good
You're welcome. :) I'm glad you finally got one of my downloads, Fireman, please keep seeding them. I have a lot of really great stuff I'd love to put up.